US X Factor New Promo Video: Critical View

 

I had to watch this video a couple of times before what I saw actually sank in. The US X Factor promotional video is, for want of a better word, astonishing. Or, you could call it rather unbelievable. It may be that Simon Cowell is wearing pink rather than his usual white/grey loose t-shirt which rather sums up his trademark personality - harsh and blunt. Or perhaps it is the fact that Cowell is acting. Yes, acting. Badly. Yes, that's it, that's why the first minute and 23 seconds are so American and so corny that you could easily compare it to your childhood viewing of the classic, cringe-inducing Power Rangers.

In the video, we are placed into the surreal world of Simon Cowell's mind, or more specifically, in one of his nightmares. The whole layout of the opening tells the educated and irony aware audience (i.e: not stupid), that this audition isn't a real one, but actually a figment of Cowell's imagination, in which a young girl who cannot sing, walks into the audition room and produces a clap and compliment from all of the judges.

We can thank God that Paula Abdul didn't pursue an acting career, as her opening line of "Hi, what's your name sweetheart?" is so wooden and rehearsed, it's almost eye-watering. Cowell then delivers his lines, which he clearly reads through gritted teeth, as we all know how much he hates being nice. I actually feel sorry for Cowell here, as he reads a script telling people how he has "changed" and cares for the people he auditions. I can guarantee you, that some people who watched the video at this point still believed that everything he says is real, and the upcoming auditions were not staged.

It is of course made to make us laugh - and it does. Seeing Simon squirm with a clear uncomfortable attitude towards acting rather than just doing his job and judging real contestants is hilarious, and it gets even better when he pretends to break out of the nightmare and proceeds in talking to himself in the way only people in Hollywood films do.

"Wow! What a horrible nightmare," he says in an exasperated tone followed by an awkward freeze frame that just adds brilliantly to the terribly hilarity of the sketch. We are then finally shown some actual footage from the auditions, which in truth does look quite exciting, with tantrums and typical Cowell insults to everyone, highlighting his hate for all human life. No sign of Cheryl Cole unfortunately.

What an acting debut from Mr Cowell though eh? It had everything - words... erm. Yeah, words, and bad acting, really, really bad acting - on par in fact with this atrocious piece of advertisement. The similarity? Both very entertaining, and at Cowell's expense. In fact, it has done it's job well - I will now watch the US X Factor if I can, only because I'll be on the look out for more diabolical, godawful sketches like this one.

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